


Only You

by ofreverentia



Series: Only Human [8]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Based on a Calum Scott song, Communication, Happy Ending, Kissing, M/M, Not Beta Read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-10 01:55:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18928939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ofreverentia/pseuds/ofreverentia
Summary: Only you, you, youOnly you, you, you





	Only You

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Please make sure to read - Dancing on my Own -> Good to you before you read this chapter. As those are linked. You are not required to read any other work in this series.

_ Only you, you, you _

_ Only you, you, you _

 

Yuzuru returned to Toronto and he felt like he was in a weird state of in between. The usual environment he had known was gone, he felt the lack of Javi more often than not at the rink. He may have only done light exercises along with his therapy plan off ice but the sound of a certain set of skates wasn’t there. On top of that his confession over LINE still kept flashing in front of his face. He had been ignoring his phone since that morning, only answering work Emails. For days he kept remembering moments at the rink, how Javier could understand his moods just by the way he moved his skates. He missed the older terribly and everyone at the rink could see that he was struggling. Not only with his injury and recovery from all over again but emotionally. People always suspected something between them, only if they knew the complete truth, how Yuzurus heart continued to bleed for someone he could not have. On some days he stayed in bed a few minutes longer after his alarm rang, just to find a reason to get out and continue.

 

Slowly with baby steps he tried to adjust to all the new things in his life, the things he didn’t pay much attention as he had goals to achieve for the season. Now where the pressure was a bit less he could try to fill the empty spaces all around him. Futile as the attempts may have been he did try. Until a very faithful day he finally let himself look at LINE and the hundreds of messages he ignored.

 

He browsed through to check who has all written to him and there, right between the Team Japan chat and that with Shoma was a name he had tried to forget. The number next to the chat causing him to nearly drop the device. With shaking fingers he tapped on it to check, the tears slowly trickling down his cheeks. 

 

_ I remember in the schoolyard _

_ The children didn't understand _

_ So they bullied me with silence _

_ Just for being who I am _

 

Two days later he still had trouble finding the right reply to the messages and missed calls. He messed up didn’t he? How can he now reply after having ignored Javier for so long. Was the older still. Oh the amount of mistakes he had made were still growing in number. He spent more and more time at the rink, just stroking around the ice, using the time to think. 

 

So when Yuzuru raised his head and looked around, spotting a familiar figure by the boards, he let out a sound like a wounded animal. There stood Javier and opened his arms to him. Swallowed hard he wondered if he should, if he can but the expression on Javier's face told him everything and he bolted across the ice to jump in the olders arms.

 

“I love you too… I am so sorry for being blind. I was hoping. I was… I failed my promise before but now…” Yuzuru heard the words against his ears and the tears started to flow without him being able to control them. They were in public place but he couldn't care less, he waited and hoped for too long. He felt Javier pulled back and gently brush the tears away from his cheeks. “I promise to be good to you.” A whimper escaped him and that was when Javier leaned in to seal his promise with a kiss. Yuzuru melted into the kiss, fingers curling in the back of his shirt. He would never let go of him again.

 

_ So I got good at keeping secrets _

_ I used to blend in with the crowds _

_ On the inside I was screaming _

_ With you I didn't have to hide _

 

After the small scene they have caused at the rink, the two escaped with flaming cheeks and heads down. Javier had taken Yuzurus bag with one and his hand with the other, unashamed to walk out like that with him. Yuzuru realized he didn’t mind either, it has been years since he wished for this, he had to make some compromises as Javier was more open with his emotions than him. He also knew that they would need to talk a lot about the past, the present and the future they want to have together.

 

Since Javier had no place in Toronto anymore and Yuzuru didn’t want to have his mother leave their apartment, they decided to go to Javiers hotel. Yuzuru felt a bit awkward coming into a place like this because they haven’t exactly spent a lot of time alone together anymore. While it was clear where they stood he felt anxious if he would be able to explain himself properly. With a sigh they deposited his bag in a corner where it wouldn’t disturb them. Yuzuru slipped out of his shoes due to habit and lingered awkwardly by the bed, not sure if he should sit or not.

 

He could feel Javiers eyes on him and the two looked at each other. Yuzuru swallowed hard. 

 

“So...I guess...we should talk?” Javier smiled fondly at him and reached for his hands. He moved without thinking and the two settled on the bed, sitting face to face, not letting go of each other. “Will you let me...talk first?” He asked. The older blinked a bit confused but nodded at him, squeezing his hand.

 

_ Only you could see that I was hurting _

_ Only you ever cared to understand _

_ Always know that I'd do the same _

_ I'd do anything for you my friend _

_ It's true _

 

“First I have to say sorry to Javi...I...I know you were in relationship and I sent you that message. I didn’t think you would ever see it and I really tried to move on.” Yuzuru started dropping his gaze at their hands instead of looking at Javier. If he would look he may not be able to finish and say all the things he needed to. “I know I made lot of mistakes, hurt Javi and myself. I wasn’t in a place where something permanent was on my mind, not when we were together. Skating is still important to me but I also know that Javi is too. I believed the two could not be together in my life. I was wrong. I want Javi by my side because you understand me the best. I never had to…” Yuzuru swallowed hard and Javier tightened his hands around his but did not interrupt. “Javi always knew me so well and I didn’t appreciate it enough. I saw after you were gone that I had someone so precious by my side. Who could understand me, knew my secrets without needing to pry. I never had trouble saying things to you like I did with others but I also wasn’t completely honest.” 

 

Yuzuru dared to glance at Javier, finding as the older looked at him with a hint of sadness, possibly recalling all the sad moments of the past but he also saw a hint of smile at the corner of his lips. “I had many people bully me for skating, for how I looked or behaved and I learned to keep things to myself, build walls. Javi broke through without much effort and it scared me. I was so scared that I would lose it and it would hurt so bad. I tried to fight it but...it made things worse. I know it was me who...I was happy for Javi for having found someone who loved you. Not easy but I tried. I hope I have not...please tell me I did not.” Yuzuru winced thinking that he may be the reason the two broke up and he ruined a perfectly fine relationship. Javier shook his head.

 

“We were once in love, if you could even call that on my part but things changed. She saw it too, we were on the same page. She always knew about us, about my feelings that never really went away even if I tried to be happy with her. To give her a relationship she deserved. It was actually her who told me I should approach you. It was that night where you sent me the message. She helped me to just try...she is a best friend I didn’t deserve.” Yuzuru relaxed at that a bit, a small smile appearing on his lips.

 

“I am sorry Javi… I should have done things differently and be more open. You were always such a support to me and I miss you so much. The ice is not the same without you and I...I miss the kisses, just laying in bed in the comfort of your arms. Is it..is it really okay? Am I not… do you really love me too? Can we make this work?”

 

_ I used to stare up at the ceiling _

_ Wide awake all through the night _

_ While the world was busy sleeping _

_ I was so caught up in my mind _

 

Javier shifted closer and let go of his hands. Yuzuru felt as warm palms cupped his cheeks, leaning in. He felt the breath of the Spaniard on his lips and a shiver ran down his spine. Oh how he had missed them being this close. 

 

“Yes. We will make this work. I love you Yuzuru. I had loved you for years and I have made my own mistakes, we both did. There is so much we need to talk about, to work through but I can’t lie to myself any longer. I want to be with you. Oh how I missed being this close to you. I want this...you.” Yuzuru opened his mouth to say something but his words got swallowed by the press of soft lips against his own. His whole body tingled and he swore he could see fireworks behind his closed lids. Fingers grasped onto the Spaniards shirt to pull him closer and Yuzuru forgot everything else.

 

Yuzuru shifted, feeling the need to be closer to Javier and ended up climbing in his lap. The two kept sharing kisses, soft and gentle. Unhurried movements, simply enjoying the closeness they did not have for a long time. Pulling back he let out a shaky breath. 

 

“Please do not leave again...it has been always you. Only you.” He confessed and Javier pressed a kiss to his forehead, brushing some hair out of his face.

 

“I am not leaving again as long you stay with me too.” Yuzuru nodded. Yes, he could agree to that.

 

_ Oh, when I'm all alone _

_ A million miles away from home _

_ You're still with me, you'll always be _

_ My rock and shoulder to lean on _

_ When every hope I have is gone _

_ I'll turn to you, you know it's true _

 

Summer time has been a good grace for the two of them, to work their issues out. Yuzuru had a hard time with his rehab again but Javier was by his side every step of the way. They talked a lot, remembering and speaking through a lot that happened in the past. Yuzuru learned to be more honest, not just rely on Javier reading his moods but actually opening up with words. He learned so many new sides and stories of the Spaniard too, each new layer he discovered making his feelings grow so much stronger. They spoke a lot about the future as well, how long Yuzuru planned to compete, work out schedules to be able to spend time together should it be in person or struggling with timezones from across an ocean. 

 

On some days Yuzuru wondered how he could let someone like the other out of his life. Why he did not fight for him before. On the other hand back a few years prior he wasn’t the person who he is now and commitment was the last thing he had on his mind. Skating was everything to him-

 

He was lost in his thoughts he didn’t feel the couch dipping next to him, until he felt a gentle hand placed on his thigh.

 

“A penny for your thoughts.” Javier said with a hint of amusement in his voice. Yuzuru smiled at him and leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek. 

 

“Just thinking how lucky I am and that I would not change anything in my life right now. I thought it was too late to find true happiness but I got another chance.” Javier wrapped his arms around his shoulder and he buried himself against his side. Yuzuru could always rely on Javier, he was the rock he needed in his life. While his mother knew how to navigate his life, Javier understood other aspects better, as he himself skated and competed for years. With the two by his side he knew he could go through every injury, recovery and disappointment. Yuzuru felt a kiss being pressed to the top of his head, making him hum. 

 

“I got my second chance too you know.” Yuzuru smiled raising his head to look at the older and moved to press a kiss to his lips.

 

“I know.”

 

_ And I know, 'til the bitter end _

_ I'll be proud to call you my best friend _

_ It's true, so true _

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: So we are finished, this series has come to an end. Thank you for sticking around for this! ♥


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